Groin alert at Newark Airport security!!

7.21am, Tuesday 12th  April, Gate 105, Terminal C, Newark Airport, New Jersey, USA

Morning folks, and I’m thrilled to bits! It looks like I’ve developed an ‘explosive’ groin whilst travelling through New York State. Going through airport security is always a trial, as I trigger the alarm properly every time, having two metal knees. So I’m put through the secondary machine where they pretty much X ray you. Last trip – travelling from Rochester, upstate New York – I triggered the ‘groin alert’ as well as the left knee. This shows up as two bright yellow boxes on the map of the girls form on the machine’s screen. Quite strange I thought, as to my knowledge, there’s nothing of an explosive nature there! Well this morning at Newark airport, I’ve done the same thing….groin alert! Now this means a very harassed female operator has to come over and offer you a private screening! I’m not going into a private room with those mostly scary looking women! No – whatever they have to do….it’s out in the open! On go the rubber gloves, then they have to scrunch and pat their way around ‘the area’ to make sure there’s nothing untoward there! Then, your hands and theirs are screened for explosive residue. So I can only assume that the machine knows something that I don’t! But I’m through security and ready to fly! Today it’s a two stage hop as I start to work my way towards the West Coast, and the end of this tour. First flight is Newark NJ to Chicago’s O’Hare airport and a ‘hot change’ of planes, and on to Des Moines, Iowa. A ‘hot change’ is one where you have less than an hour between the scheduled arrival of your first flight, and the departure of your connecting flight. Once in Des Moines – it’s off to a consumer dinner at a golf club.This will be my first ever visit to Iowa, which means I will now be able to claim 36 of the American states that I’ve been in…..only 14 to go!

So we’ll see you when it’s amongst the cornfields of Iowa.

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